livestudioaudience | R4 Viewing Party - no crying til the end (if you can help it)

[ So hey, this is fine. Yuuri's not watching Airlocked but there's only so many things it can mean when Ardyn goes storming out of the room (and you bet she's keeping an eye out for exactly that sort of thing on a Friday of all days) there's only so much it can be.

She gives him about half a minute (she doesn't have your self control, sorry Ardy) before she heads off after him. Where have you disappeared to, Dad, please don't say it's the roof because not everyone can warp up there. ]

[He didn't make it that far. Ardyn ended up in the kitchen, sitting at the table with his head in his hands and a thousand-yard stare of infinite regret focused on nothing while Luscinia preened at his hair as she did when he was wherever he'd currently gone.]

[ That's what she thought. She hangs back for a few moments before walking over and very gently setting her hand on his arm. She doesn't want to startle him but she doesn't want him getting lost wherever he's gone before she can get him back. ]

Hey. I'm here, okay? Talk to me.

[He didn't flinch or react at Yuuri's hand on his arm, Luscinia ruffling her feathers restlessly. It was a long few moments before Ardyn said anything, and when he did his voice was worn down by exhaustion into something utterly deadpan.]

...Uncertainty would have been worse--knowing they were dead and having no concept of how.

[ Ah. That's what she thought. But still it makes her heart sink to hear it. She immediately thinks of Noctis, already having an unimaginably terrible time and she feels ill at the thought of him walking into the sitting room and seeing this.

Thank god for his crew. Yuuri's not entirely sure she has it in her to fight two battles today.

She makes a soft noise of assent and settles into a seat next to him, hand still on his arm, just in case he needs something to anchor him to here and now. ]

Just having to sit back and imagine all the ways it could've gone wrong. I know what you mean. But it's still... it's not easy to see. Not at all.

One would think it easier, after everything else.

[Guilt was a hell of an emotion and it was not one he cared for.]

[ She gives a dry little "hah" with no humor to it whatsoever. ]

You'd think. But it never does.

[ And, bizarre as it is, she hopes it never does. She doesn't want any of this to ever become any more mundane and she never wants to be any less angry about what Intergal 7 has done to them. ]

Are you... [ 'going to be okay' she almost says but stops herself. Stupid question. ] Is there anything you need? Just tell me. I'll do whatever I can.

I'll manage; it isn't as if we were close, to say the least. It's Noctis I'm worried about.

[Ardyn dropped his hands from his head, taking a deep breath and sighing.]

...come here?

[please hug your dad yuuri]

[ Well she really doesn't have a choice, does she? She steps forward without even hesitating and gives him a fierce, tight hug. It's a little strange to be on the other side of this -- she's felt like she was going to pieces for what feels like weeks now. But right now, it's as easy as anything to hold herself and Ardyn up. If Ardyn needs a moment, or however long it takes, to be weak then Yuuri's going to be as strong as he needs her to be the entire time. ]

... it's. It's okay, you know. Just because they were Noctis'... [ friends? family? or just because they were his in its entirety, with all the complex feelings that idea encompasses just like Ardyn is theirs no matter how it's defined. ] That doesn't mean you're not allowed to be hurt, too.

It feels far less simple and straightforward than that.

[But at least he was a little calmer now, holding on to Yuuri as securely as he ever did.]

...I have to get them back, Yuuri. It's hardly going to make up for anything I did to them and Prompto may well kill me on sight, but...whatever it takes, I have to get them back.

I know. We're going to march right up to wherever they're being kept and we'll get them back, whatever it takes. I know I make it sound so easy and it... it probably won't be, will it?

[ She gives a nervous laugh and pats his back gently. ]

But we'll do it. If we're all stood together then I don't think there's a thing in the world we can't do. And then once it's all said and done... that means they've got a second chance, doesn't it? To keep on living.

[ A second chance to find somewhere to make a home, to make a family, for Noctis and Luna to finally get married without death and despair hanging over them. She likes the idea of it. ]

...Yes, you're right. Forgive me, I'm...trying to keep myself together.

[He pulled back enough to press a light kiss to Yuuri's forehead, managing a shaky smile.]

[ She gives him one in return -- a little less shaky, but no less tired, and shakes her head. ]

No, it's nothing you need to apologize for. This... it's a lot, isn't it? All of it. And I know you won't stop watching. If you feel like it's what you have to do, then I can't make you stop. But if you feel like you need to step away or you have to take a break or anything just... come find me and we'll go into the garden. Okay?

[ It's not as good as hit me as hard as you can but hopefully it's as good a substitute as she can provide. ]

I will, Yuuri. I promise you that.

...What have I ever done to deserve any of you?

Well, you had the terrible fortune of being stuck on the same spaceship as us and then we couldn't leave well enough alone. It's a terrible burden to carry, I know, but plenty of people make it through life with a clingy family.

[ Her smile's a little brighter now, just a little steadier. ]

Do you think you can handle that?

...No idea, I've never had one.

[His brother had been clingy in his own way, once--but that had been so long ago as to have already been a distant memory when Ardyn was still human.]

But I think I'd like to give it a try and see where things go from here.

Me either. I guess that makes this a learning experience for the both of us.

[ They'll make it works. She knows they will. ]

I hope you're fully prepared to get much the same in return.

[Ardyn stood up, made a bit of a show of dusting himself off, then-]

[...hugged Yuuri and picked her up like she weighed about the same as a couple of grapes.]

I have been told I'm completely insufferable.

Wh--!

[ That's all she gets out before she realizes she's getting scooped up off her feet like a child. Whatever else she was going to say gets lost as he startles a laugh out of her and she finds that once she's started, she can't easily make herself stop. ]

Y--you see?! All that about me being the most dangerous one here and you go and pick me up like you're scruffing a kitten!

Even a kitten can cause untold destruction left alone for too long with anything remotely breakable.

R4 Viewing Party - no crying til the end (if you can help it)

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